Joomla Genius Expert Needed ASAP Need to Start Today

This is for an Adult Site. I need a Joomla expert someone who understands everything about Joomla. Need the site done fast, also don't have time to play around with people who cannot speak English or write me a simple email or never answer their phones. This is a big site, I have listed this 3 times in 3 days, don't bid if you bid over last few days. You must be able to talk on Skype when i award this project. please do not bid if you have 0 bid history please do not bid if you cannot speak English please do not bid if you have less the 80% completion rating, and less then 4.8 feedback please do not bid if you cannot do this within the time frame. Everything is laid out crystal clear in my instructions, you must work live on my server. Also please do not waste my time with a copy and pasted message. Deadline is 2 days, and budget is a maximum $225.00 including freelancer fees, please include the phrase, jump jump jumping. Will only create a $50.00 milestone and will not release anything until finished, thank your fellow freelancers for the trust issues. If you send me a message with a copy and paste message you will be reported as spam.